What does this little phrase really mean?

Recently, I have been paying more attention to the phrases we use in ordinary conversations. From time to time, this phrase has come up as the introductory sentence to a following one that usually does make one feel exactly like they would have felt if that phrase was not used in the first place.

“I don’t want you to think that I don’t care but I have been wondering lately if you forget that I also have things to do” or “I don’t want you to feel like you are wasting your time but I am not in the mood to do X or Y” – OK, how does the person saying this expect the person they are telling it to to feel or think? Less of what the latter was warned about?

Although it can genuinely mean that the person is really trying to prevent any form of misunderstanding by starting the conversation with that phrase, can it also be used, consciously or subconsciously, as a manipulative tool to retract your freedom to feel whatever way you, as a unique individual, would feel about the issue? To make up your own thinking about it? Is the person trying to tell you that if you feel exactly that way you would be “pathetic” for doing so?

Food for thought.

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